Thank you…

2008 is coming to an end… 2009 will be arriving in a few more minutes (based on d time i wrote dis blog) …

Here, I want to take this opportunity to say a million of thanks to people who had make remarkable changes in my life in one way or another, directly or indirectly, positively or negatively…

To the person who is with me from the beginning till the end,

Accompanying me all the way throughout my fight with STPM,

Lending me a strong and firm shoulder day and night,

Tolerating my unreasonable tantrums and attitude,

Holding my hands walking through the difficult times of my life this whole year…

Thank you gong… Thank you Foo Kiat…

“At the bottom of luck means beginning of luck is waiting for you…” (03.10.08 ~ 22:46)

To my gang,

Who readily accept me for who I am,

Never blame me for anything,

Understand my situation and condition willingly,

Pull me up from sadness, raise me up for more happiness,

The days with you all I will cherish forever…

Especially “Tapi adik-adik kena tukar pakaian ya… Tak boleh pakai uniform masuk cinema la…”,

Lost in the way from Cineleisure to One Utama,

Dealing with the horror of Quarantine,

And many many more…

Thank you for accompanying me all the way throughout my Upper 6 life…

Thank you Shuk Chen, Wan Theng, Li Ting, Joanne, Sue Ann, Dhivya, Fei Ling…

Shuk Chen,

Thank you for willing to clean up the excretory wastes in the class with me…

Thank you for accompanying me for the ‘so poh’ journey in the whole school with blue ribbons like sakai together with Wan Theng, (too bad we din take photos!)

Thank you for making me feel better all the time…

“Ai yo... Why she like this do thing one... Compare to you, all those are just small matter compared to what you have sacrificed... Just now I cried don’t mean to make you luan... I just cant help it... Stress! You don’t cry a... Don’t think too much... Go to sleep… Everything will be over after tomorrow… Then off your phone for a whole week… STUDY! I m going to do the same... Haha...” (07.11.08 ~ 00:24)

Wan Theng,

Thank you for letting me throw sweet wrappers on your desk…

Thank you for bearing with me all these while…

Thank you for being my loyal listeners to all my grudges…

“Where got I scold you for sms me o? Yala… Sometimes your sms got effect of motivation... I dint mind if you sms me de… BUT… I think you should go STUDY NOW!” (15.11.08 ~ 16:26)

Li Ting,

I know you and me tak biasa with all those sentimental de thing,

So now get to a more innocent (and me act stupid) de mode,

Thank you for all your cold jokes, dun care when the weather is cold or hot,

I’m waiting to go your house, want see the ah pek play guitar while sing ar!!!

But really thanks a lot for fetching me back…

I’ll remember de oh our first time push car with few leng zhai(s)…

And our trip to KLCC also lar…

And thank you for trying to be sentimental and try to make me cry (though not successful)

“Some people bite others when angry~ Some cry when sad~ I told cold joke when boring~ It is ok to express our feeling by cry, bite people n even told cool joke~ But the fact is the problem will not solve after you bite someone~ So try dun be so emotional n you save a lot of ATP~” (03.11.08 ~ 23:18)

“A journey end is a start of another~ Hope I can be there for one after another~ Because that are friends for~ Thanks also for being my friend n let me feel that I am not alone~” (03.12.08 ~ 23:25)

Joanne,

I really love the comic you drew for me…

It is d best in my heart…

And remember the poem you wrote for me for SFC retirement?

“Your presence…

Saves the hopeless…

Touches the emotionless… And

Heals those who are hurt…

Fills in the emptiness…

Warms the coldness…

Lightens the darkness…

Erase the evilness…

Your presence is nothing but a divine gift for everyone and me to cherish…

So,

Thank you for being my friend, you will always be a part of my memory…”

Thank you for your master pieces…

Sue Ann,

Dear dear!

Really my pleasure getting to know you…

You were ever ready when it comes to listening to my problems…

And being there for me when I find no one to talk to…

You accompanied me walked through the hardest part in my life…

And you never leave me alone in search of true friendship…

MC-ing for 50^th Merdeka celebration, a moment to cherish…

Trip to KLIA and the tough process, a moment of gratitude that it is over…

Dhivya,

Dear…

Thanks for all your support and laughter…

It brightens up my days!

The Deepavali celebration in your house…

I really enjoyed it very much…

Ya… Prince William is more handsome than Prince Harry

* No offence, just a personal opinion =P *

“Dear don’t worry. Tomorrow you will do fine, just be alert and everything will go on smoothly. All the best and god will guide you” (14.01.08 ~ 21:59)

Fei Ling,

We are always the sweet sweet gang ma…

Though Shuk Chen quitted, but we remain as the candy-loving gang!

You are more matured in thinking and actions…

Thank you for all that…

Love you too!!!

Jia Wei,

I think you are right…

Cos we are of d same age, so we are a bit ‘closer’ den d rest…

Though the closeness does not really last long,

But d whole process is something that I don’t mind going through again…

I sincerely apologize if I hurt your feelings unintentionally…

For me, you are always my best friend even if we did not really talk to each other anymore…

Cos our silent ‘communication’ is something that will trigger my tear gland whenever I look back…

“It’s not the matter me intelligent… ‘take pride in how far you have come, have faith in how far you can go’. Got ohm? We can work together in studies, I’ll help you.” (13.09.07 ~ 21:21)

“… smile and be happy always. If tuanku titahkan, hamba akan balasah orang tu… :-)” (29.08.07 ~ 23:35)

* Jia Wei is a Taekwondo pro *

Adrian,

My friend since kindergarten ah, kai wan xiao!

You have your own unique way of making me happy and laugh…

Talking to you I feel no stress, no burden…

We can talk about anything under the sky, from things related to us to those we don’t know…

I still remember last time when I was sad you said something that make me smile back

“Wah! Mei Kin sad a… Faster call everyone go Pizza Hut. Today Mei Kin belanja”

Such a unique way, how can I forget!

Sor Poh Lee Pei Yin,

You know what, I really miss the time sitting beside you…

We can laugh over slightest thing…

Yet when it comes to Add Maths we can be serious like nobody’s business.

You now still got ‘lau zap’ when drink water or not a?

And… Use water ‘put’ (Cantonese) fire…

Clumsy la you sor poh…

But that’s what makes me laugh all the time…

“Sor poh… Don’t simply think lah. I really don’t mean to isolate you la. Don’t worry la. I won’t leave you alone…” (6.10.07 ~ 23:33)

Wilson,

Saya rasa awak pasti ingat saya dah lupa kat awak kan…

Tapi, saya tak pernah lupakan awak, seorang kawan baik saya…

Your curiosity really kills me a!!!

Tapi lama-kelamaan, saya belajar untuk menerima sifat ‘unik’ kamu…

Memang tidak dapat dinafikan kamu merupakan salah seorang sahabat karib saya yang tiada orang dapat ganti…

I was really touched that night when you called me…

To cheer me up though it was really very late already.

And thanks for your phone call…

Few hours before you departed to Canada…

You are a great guy, keep it up and remember us in Malaysia!

Yoke Kheng @ Evelyn,

I know you as Yoke Kheng, but people know you as Evelyn, as KW’s lao po,

World so small o? We met in Perfection, be friends, separate…

Then met again one fine day in the train…

Then lost in touch…

Browse browse suddenly saw you in Friendster, with another identity…

Thanks for your laughter, your phone call and your sms!

Mxxx,

* I know Sue Ann will roll up her eyes *

Already have a blog entry dedicated to you,

Yet I have to say thank you very very much…

For being there with me and telling me everything will be alright…

Accompanying me to Konsert Senandung Kasih…

Agreed to attend Kem Perpaduan and trip to KLIA…

And waking up before my morning call…

(to jog, but unfortunately raining)

I don’t know how long it will take for you to accept me back as your friend,

But really appreciate every moment we shared together as friend…

I really really miss you this friend…

But GOD planned it to be this way, I have no choice but to follow…

Sorry I couldn’t celebrate every year’s Christmas with you as promised,

But I will make sure I give you something every Christmas to let you know I still remember my promise

This will be my 3^rd promise to you…

Kah Weng / Lut Pig,

Really need to thank you for being my friend all these while…

Thanks for all your sms and words…

It will stay in my heart…

“… Just sorry to bodoh. Whatever it is bodoh has lut pig… Trust lut pig” (05.12.08 ~ 23:53)

I hope bodoh will stay in lut pig’s heart till the end…

To everyone I know…

I might left out your names

Cos there are too many people I should say thank you to…

But no matter what,

Each and everyone of you left prints in my life…

Thanks for everything…

Though 2008 is not a good year for me

But I am satisfied and happy to have all of you with me…

May 2009 bring more happiness to us!

H@PpY NeW yEaR!!!

With deepest love,

# Mei KiN #

ENDING...........

Not bad ma… last blog posted more than 24 hours before d start of new year! Haha…

New year shud hav new hope, new objective ma, riet? Well, stop crapping ba.. these r not wat I wana write on my last blog… I’m going to tell another story… to wrap up everything…

I started this blog is cos I wana try to find back d close connection tat I once had wit my very very best fren. But lately I grow very tired, feel I cant handle it anymore… so I decided tat fren ma, once u let go it will not cum back again…

I knew him since I was in F2. we were in d same society. Tat time, he just joined d society. I still rmb when I saw him dat day he was clad in his KRS green uniform, trying to tackle a pretty gal by d name of… May? She’s a very pretty gal, my best fren once, till sth bad happened la. My story is not about me n her, so I shud not elaborate lar…

mm… me n him was not tat close till we were in f4. everyday during recess, it will be us one whole gang there… he’ll oways hold his add maths book wit his calculator, while I will sit there chat n laugh wit our gang… consist of many ppl la… me, A, CW, OY, WK, KM etc etc… we had lots of fun together la…

den our club had dis annual programme of writing letters to juniors… it’s called ‘Secret Angel’. I had my senior tat time… but other than writing to my senior, me n him wrote to each other as well. He told me how he courted May last time… and we berbalas letters for 3 to 4 times la… we were reli close frens last time. We spent our recess time together as a gang and ath, we will laugh together..

In f4, during my bday, they celebrated wit me. Tat was my first time celebrating bday wit my frens. Tat day no one remembered to bring matches for d cake and my dis best fren went home to get it…

And one day, he quarreled wit CW. Me n A was trying to make them berbaik semula… since tat time start, our frenship had changed. He no longer spend his recess time wit us in UBK room… he was busy wit his martial art club’s things wit another gal… we no longer laugh together and our letter-writing mission stopped not long after tat…

Things turn to the worse when he n CW quarreled again. Dis time me n A decided not to campur tangan. And without knowing it, dis causes our frenship to drift further away… further and further tat we oni say HI when we met along d corridor. But once a while we did talked together though not as close as last time…

As time passes, his name began to fade from my life. I was surprised seeing him studying f6 lik me. But things between us had gone worse than b4. this time around, we did not even say hi when we met. Lik total strangers?

It was in U6 tat I made up my mind tat things shud not continue dis way. During orientation week, I put him under d same group as me, hoping tat we can work together again… and for activities part, fate has it tat I was in d same group as him too… but thought remains as thought. Wat happened does not go according to d plan.

Few days before orientation week start, d teacher advisor told me tat she will b absent on d few days throughout our orientation week. And she wants me to take care of d whole programme, to go from dis end to tat end, make sure everyone is safe. 18 and 19 years old students need to be taken care of? I was thinking… but I had no choice but to obliged. My plan was ruined by d order…

Den cum carnival. I got a surprise from him. Sth tat reli reli surprised me a lot. I guess tat was a way for him to express his gratitude for my ‘honey drink’ when he was coughing d other day…

I tot tat god has paved a way for us to be best fren once again. Things seems to go on pretty smooth in d beginning, but not towards d end.

During d eve of graduation day, I was giving out sth to those ppl hu leave a print in my heart. I was actually thinking whether I shud giv him d more expensive but not so nice wan, or d one I like d most but not as expensive as d other one. At last I made up my mind to giv him d cheaper one. Though I feel tat he deserve sth tat worth more in money sense, but I followed my heart. It was a star… I hope tat it will light up his life when he feels alone in dis world, as a star is a symbol of hope.

Graduation day… d day I had most fun with him… but good times dun last…

Mayb my messages both in msn and smses make him feel tat I very fan. Day after day, sumtimes I could get good chat wit him, sumtimes I just get a cold ‘wat’. Mayb cos he feel I fan, we cant reli hav a good chat anymore…

Soon I realize tat I am very annoying n disturbing his life, so I end up not reloading my phone so tat I wont sms him n fan him…

I went to d extend of online later at nite cos I wana see whether he did change his display name in msn or not. But once after another obstacle disrupt my plan. At last I saw him online… wit d nickname dat I was waiting for…

But not long after he online. He changed his nick name… mayb tat’s when I realize tat things just cant return back to last time ba…

If he say himself xiao qi, I am ten times more xiao qi den him…

Just lik d sms my fren sent me… frenship are just lik balloons, once u let them go, they will never cum back…

I am actually very tired… if I sms him he will feel I fan. If I din sms him it is as if I giv up.

At last, I made up my mind to giv up after wat happened yesterday… I tell myself I shud not be so stupid. D story of LP and B had END long time ago! Why I refuse to accept dis fact!!!

My sis once told me tat a girl’s best fren is oways a boy… and a boy’s bestfren is oways a girl… I think it is true, but just dat I am always lack of luck ba… wit whichever guy also cant be best fren.

“If one day you say you are hungry, I will jump down from d boat to get fishes for u…

If wind blows, I will take over the yacht and sail d boat for u…

If u say u dun wana see me, I will jump into d sea, let the shark decide…”

Thank you very much for all your promises… all your care and for your frenship… I reli appreciate wat u did n said, but I am just getting to tired to fight my heart to do sth tat my brain said I shud not do. I think words are easy to say, but easy to forget as well?

No… I din blame u… for forgetting wat u asked me to trust n blif...

Just hope tat u will oways stay happy. if u dun take yr 1^st move now, later she let ppl rampas liao u dun cry a!!!

With this, I end my story…

Happy New Year!

* pictures in dis blog quite blur. Sorry… =P

HEART PAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

heart pain a~~~

apa tidak nye... haihz

benci betul la. saya nak balik ke masa lampau!!!!!!

belakangan ini rase keseorangan... Zzzzzzzz...

aik... BM tak baik... macam mane nak terus tulis...

CHRISTMAS IS HERE!!!

again... another lonely xmas... HAIHZ!

stupid gong! make me 3 years no xmas ah! dis year tot can celebrate xmas go wet de, mana tau he going singapore. useless a!!! lie my feelings! zzzzzzz

well, as a punishment, asked him get me 5 souvenirs. kira good la. last time he went dno which island, ask him get back 10 souvenirs he got 0 ah! teruk betul.

hmm... anyway, reli sad lar today...

I MAU BALIK KAMPUNG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i reli miss kampung ar!!! kampung ah kampung... when oni i can go see u ah...

anyway, MERRY XMAS to EVERYONE!!!!!! i miss d world!!!

Meng a, noe u wun read dis de, but since i promised b4 tat every xmas will celebrate wit u, but v both noe cannot, so i did my best alr lor! hope u will be surprised when u receive it!

lut pig... haha. dno can call u dis name anot lea. u ask evry1 call u daniel o. (dun lik dat name). so i call u 'ei' la ha. haha! lost in touch for almost one week liao, u busy working, slowly slowly bodoh become not bodoh jor, lut pig also bcum daniel jor. aih. many things to say, but... anyway, gambatte o!

adrian, dis year no xmas carolling, sure boring ne! go KTV sing lar! haha... miss u loads ler fren!!!

chin wah, tak sangka u will leave comment for me o. hehe. long time din c u jor hoh? hmm... reli miss d days when v walked back together!

so poh lee pei yin ar! miss u till wan die! haha. u dun run here n dere liao a! i will go your house dalam masa terdekat!

shuk chen, wan theng, li ting, joanne (Jo), sue ann (Dear Dear), dhivya (Dear), fei ling... my gang! MISS U GUYS!!!!

my dearest sis, i tak de lelaki simpanan lar. tak macam u. gatal! haha. anyway, put d past aside, be happy! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

last but not least, of course to gong and tiger moo lor. hehe. so cute de. dun forget my FIVE presents a. no discount! dun go around travelling jor la...

and to ALL my frens, have a GREAT XMAS!!!!

LOVE U ALL!!!

Blog

single word titles are my favourite. haha

hmm... last time i used to think tat how world change also, impossible i'm going to open a blog. cos it's time consuming and another is i feel secrets shud be kept, not announced to d whole world ma, riet??? haha

u see ar... your blog ah... u write it out anyone can cum across your blog and see... den sumtimes o, u noe sum ppl hav d habit of reading your blog, u can't write ath bad about tat person de wor. if not later kena belasah. so if u ask me whether blog is a good way to express your feelings, i say yes, but it is not d BEST way lor...

i'm used to gossiping with adrian and so poh lee pei yin. haha. so suddenly ask me gossip in dis blog, diam diam let chaur jang read, sumore ask me whether wat i say true anot (refer PATIENCE MEI KIN PART 1). see. it's dangerous to gossip in open space.

say gossip, sure is personal and closed de mar. where can talk out so loud de. haha

sumore sum secrets, blog out means u r indirectly telling d whole world about it wor. say liao secret means oni CERTAIN ppl can read ma...

ai ya... so serba salah lah me. here start a blog, there talk bad about blogging... haha

mayb sum things i shud go back to the old traditional conventional way lor... things like secrets and gossips dat i dun wan so many ppl to noe... shud write in my personal diary or find so poh or adrian. at least can have sum good laugh out of it rather than looking at FONTS. zzzzzz

NO!!! i'm not being negative ar! i'm a proton, not an electron. zzzzzzz

yes yes... i got diary de o. but very long no use liao. few months liao lor. mayb shud start using it again. but sumtimes find typing fun-ner (more fun) than writing. but long din write, must practise writing liao.

** yesterday my dad ask me to write something on an envelope. found out my writing getting worse! my dad was staring at me.. like tadika students..haha

Feelings...

hav to control myself le... though i love pink, but one good fren said pink make her read till pening wor... zzzzzzzz

lately have been controlling my wild feelings alot lea... wat wild feeling? dno o... stupid feeling cuming at d wrong time. crazy wan.

to stop tat stupid feeling i have to stop sms tat person... have to control lar... when my mind and my hand refuse to listen to my heart, i use the hard way - dun reload my phone. zzz... stupid ppl using stupid ways. haha

mm... feelings start to fade lately. actually also dno wat is my heart thinking... (heart? think? i tot oni brain thinks!) dun care la! wat i noe is i definitely cannot let dis feeling continue going on, cannot let my heart control my brain, my emotion control my actions! (sounds lik i am a rational person~ haha~~~)

so far so good lar... i noe if i continue sms him i'll be blinded by those sms. zzzz.... not suit to be shown here. haha

anyway, i am living a quiet and boring life now. no more excitement in my life, waiting for sms or wat-so-ever. hehe

TRUST

Trust… a word tat carries out a deep meaning… a couple will break up if no trust. A student will get 0 marks for exam if teacher din trust he din copy during exam. Wat more? Frens will quarrel if there’s no trust among each other…

For me, trust remains a word. Easy to say, easy to promise.

“Trust me!”

“Oh… Ok…”

“I trust you…”

“Oh. Thanks”

D word “TRUST” just turn around and around and around…

When sum1 ask u to trust them, wat u take into consideration? D seriousness in deir face? Wat if u cant c their expression? Guess whether they are serious or not? Come on lah. Dun think u r very great, can noe wat others think.

Or straight ask “Eh, u serious ah?” dun be stupid. Of course ppl will say they’re serious.

Mayb u can oni depend on ur heart to c whether sum1 n sth worth ur trust anot…

Mind u. u trust sum1 doesn’t mean u can trust everything they say. Hu noes… at tat moment they meant it. After a while they even forget wat they ask u to trust about them. Rubbish.

I purposely make dis blog un-understandable by any1. cos I dun wan ppl to understand wat I write.

I trust so many ppl… but which time is they reli prove to me they are worth my trust?? One in hundred? Though I’ve been cheated of my trust many times, I still say tat I trust him/her/them. (sumtimes it is better not to be specific)

Actually u cant trust any1 in dis world. Not even your best fren. Not even your own heart. Cos your heart can betray you. Our hearts often do things tat can mislead us. Cos our heart is diff from our brain. It cant analyse wat we shud blif, wat v shudn’t blif. Riet?

Lately I’ve been taken on a merry-go-round. A very fast wan. One minute u r on top, another moment u’ll b down to d earth. I’m tired of playing dis kind of game. U duno when u can trust d merry-go-round to bring u high up to d sky, when u’ll be brought down back on earth again. My brain turns and turns and lost its rationality. Which moment I shud trust, which I shudnt.

I reli shud call it a quit. Actually I shud do it 18 days ago. But my heart just dun wan listen to me. It just refuse to trust wat my brain analysed. Now tat I noe d truth liao, I guess my heart hav to follow wat had been decided. Enough is enough. I dun wan risk another chance to hurt myself. No matter wat is said/done, I must never never trust it again!!!!

Pls dun cum near me anymore!!!!!!!!