Reminder

when you are sad + mood-less + stress + tired + many things in your mind to think about, the last thing you hope will come to you is a reminder of your past.

i took a week or so to forget about my results. to get over the fact that i did badly (compare to previous semesters) but i did not really put the blame completely on myself. seriously... how could you expect students to score in exam when

1. there are 9 chapters, the lecturer taught just 6 chapters and ask you to read the rest of the chapters yourself, saying that they are easy

2. you don't understand how the lecturer come out with that answer in his slide, so you went and ask him about it. and he told you that he also don't know how to get the answer

3. worse of all, the questions that the lecturer did not managed to answer, come out in your final exam. not 1 question, not 2... but more than half of the paper

4. i got a B despite getting the highest score during mid term exam

i might sounds bad putting all the blames on the lecturer, but i am really unhappy with the results i got. another subject that makes my score drops, ORGANIC CHEMISTRY. a subject i dislike, and with my poor memory, i cannot MEMORIZE things, i have to UNDERSTAND things. can you make sense out of organic chemistry? for me, i can't. maybe due to my slow and not-creative brain.

these 2 subjects really dragged my pointer down down down.... you thought i am happy with that? with my achievements (that i think is not 100% my fault) ? must i show people around me how sad/unhappy/down am i? showing people how weak you are doesnt solve the problem, it only makes ppl around you worry! especially when there are some understanding friends who tried to console you!

and when a close friend asked you about your results, you told him honestly, at last what he did? use it in fb as publicity? what else can i say? *heartbroken*

boleh je dia tulis dan komen pasal keputusan peperiksaan saya yang teruk pada sem lepas. apa yang saya buat hanyalah memberi sokongan kepadanya untuk terus berusaha bagi menaikkan pointer dia!!! dan membaiki hidup dia!!! itu pun salah ke? itu pun nak kena sindir balik??? dan beritahu kepada seluruh dunia mei kin lepas join jpk results dia menurun merosot teruk etc etc

AT LEAST I DID NOT FAIL ANY OF MY SUBJECTS AND I KEEP MY POINTER ABOVE 3.00!!!!

perasaan sekarang : sakit hati. rasa mcm dikhianati kwn baik sendiri. bagitau results tapi dia gunakannya untuk attack kamu balik. pada waktu di mana kamu sedang mencari kegembiraan dan ketenangan, dia ungkit kembali kisah silam kamu. buka kembali buku sejarah lama yang dah lama kamu tutup. soalannya : perlu ke???

tolonglah berikan kekuatan kepada saya untuk tidak terus marah pada kawan saya ni.. beri lah saya kekuatan untuk memaafkan kata-kata serta perbuatannya selama ni.. *rasa macam nak nangis....*

patut kah saya marah atau menangis?

saya perlukan ketenangan dan kekuatan....

p/s : jangan risau... post ini ditulis ketika emosi saya tidak stabil... lepas stabil nanti ok lah saya... diri saya akan ok, dan kawan saya pun akan ok...